Boys suck

Last sunday Brad broke up with me. said he wasn't ready for another relationship cause he was still thinking about his ex and that it wasn't fair to me. yet he still thinks i'm hot and fantastic and he still has feelings for me but we aren't dating. but apparently he still wants to be friends and still hang out. well i'll believe it when i see it. so many of my exs have told me that in the past and look what happened. i don't really talk to any of them anymore. and apparently i can be pushy so for the last 3 days i haven't tried to contact brad at all, not thru email, or phone or text. and i'm going to continue not to contact him because i want him to do it first. so we'll see if he actually does. he said he would keep in contact this week cause he was busy but so far he hasn't. so who knows.

why is it so hard for me to keep relationships? am i doing something wrong? or is there something wrong with me? i just don't get it. if i'm so wonderful and fantastic and he has feelings for me, then why can't he just date me? i really like him and this sucks that we aren't dating anymore.

i found out that i get to go camping with Ash, Jody and Jenn after all. they are giving me the 13-16th off which i'm glad about. i really didn't want to miss out on camping just cause i got a new job. the only thing is i have to drive up myself cause the girls are going on the wednesday. so i'm going to go to my class thursday morning and then drive up to clearwater. first road trip with my new car!!

work is still going pretty good. learning books was fun on thursday. and i'm doing it tomorrow and monday so that should be interesting. see if i can remember it all lol luckily tomorrow there will be someone that knows what they are doing and can help me.

that's really all i got for now. tonight i'm going to Habano's for my friend Kim's birthday, should be a good time!! i haven't been to the bar in quite awhile so i'm looking forward to drinking and having a good time.